Somewhere Else
by Cauvilious
Summary: Love often finds itself in the strangest of places, and beings. It comes to those when they do not look for it. And in this case, it starts on a normal day in a busstop. 2D x Noodle. Alternate meeting & ages. Language, self abuse, drugs, sexuality.
1. La Chica

Somewhere Else

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Disclaimer: I don't own the Gorillaz or anyone in the videos. Sadly.

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A/N: What really goes on in the events leading up to El Manana, but I won't spoil it.** Alternate meeting with Noodle, alternate storyline altogether**, but it eventually works, so go along with it and enjoy! (Any flashbacks, thoughts, or memories are in italics). **2D's POV**, except for one chapter I haven't even stared writing. Rating may go up, but only for one chapter.

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Chapter One

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We needed help. Badly.

Albums not selling. Just a bunch of lazy, sloppy, self-abusive, jerk-off guys who layed around and slept with anything that moved. Ever since Paula left, we basically crawled under a rock.

We are the Gorillaz and we wear that name proudly.

My name's 2D. Yeah, you heard right. Or, it's as good as my real name. People just call me 'D' or 'Denty' or 'Face Ache' or one of the sort. Muds (or Murdoc) gave me the name when he dented in my eyes over some girls. And he got me so bad I was in a friggin' coma and he didn't even go out with them. All that for nothing. But, y'know.

Muds can get pretty bad, but he's smart, and you _have_ to respect him. Or at least tolerate him. 'Cause he'll have your head if you don't. He can beat ya around sometimes, but you have to realize that underneath it all, he _sucks_. But we don't say anything. I respect him, and people ask me, "Why? What good has he done for you?" And I say, "I dunno." But that's who he is, and I guess we've all adjusted.

Russel, he don't talk much. 'Nuff said.

Anyways, as I was saying, we needed help. And one day we were talking about it and someone, probably Muds himself, threw it out on the table - get some chick to help us out with our music and clean out this shithole of a house. And get some guy fans. But I think ol' Murdy just likes the idea of a hot young girl living with three guys. Something's bound to happen, eh?

So, after a month of planning, we held an audition in March. It was kind of funny watching all these dudes show up, 'cause we specified girls. They just wanted to see us - who doesn't? And this one kid, maybe seventeen, was dressed up like a girl, and we almost couldn't tell until he sang. So.

But, all in all, it was slow, 'cause we weren't that popular in the first place. So we dropped that idea.

And then one day I was in the city, in April, doing what I usually do when I go into the city (smoke, drink, gamble, etc) when I saw this chica at the bus stop. And I did like a seven-take or something. She was **hot**. With violet hair and some blue eyeliner and a union soldier hat, it was hard to see why she wasn't sitting with someone.

Well._ I_ wasn't complaining.

Ok, so she was young. _Really_ young. Like, 15 or 16. And I'm 23. But she caught my eye, and I couldn't resist, so shoot me.

And I just dropped my cigarette and took like six hundred mints and left everything and went over and pretended I was waiting for a bus. She did not look up once - her face was buried in a magazine whose cover was blaring **"Government's new project is mandatory."**

Since we were the only ones there, I decided to strike up conversation. "The gov'nment don' know 'ow ta do anythin'," I voiced, looking at the street. Not the best topic, but, y'know...

She looked up. Her eyes were like charcoal, black as night or whatever. She gave me a polite smile. "It doesn't," she agreed, her eyes resting on a hickie I had so pleasurably gotten in a nightclub. "Always making a big deal over nothing."

Her voice was sweet, but hinting a bit of a Japanese accent. Still, we all "spoke English", and it sounded fine when we were singing. And I didn't even know if she could sing, but she'd be one hell of a girlfriend. I hoped. It had been so long since I dated someone who wasn't a slut. And even if she WAS a slut, she sounded really cool to hang out with...

I chuckled. Me, getting ahead of myself! "I mean, everythin' they do is the decision ofone man who don't listen to tha public, 'nd 'e goes nd' makes it all mandatory. It's like communism aw summfink'."

"It's worse than communism," she said, scanning the article, "Punishable by death. Last week, a family who spoke out was court-martialed. We have to watch what we say."

"Tragic. But theah's nothin' we can really do otha than that, y'know?"

Suddenly, she glared. It was upsetting because she was one of those people not created to get mad and when they did it was creepy. Not like weird-creepy, but creepy because the picture gets burned into your mind and whenever they're upset you remember it. "Are you kidding?" We could do everything, we just may not live to see the problems fixed."

Ouch. Politics with strangers. I backed off, retreating casually to one small corner of the bus stop thingy. No need to make the mistress mad.

But her temper rested, and she smiled apologetically. "Sorry," she said, blushing, and she looked around her shoulders like someone out there might be listening, "But... Don't go calling the cops, but I'm a member of the PPCDA, and some things are going on and it's getting tight. We're all a little bit edgy now."

The PPCDA. I had heard of it. It was some underground movement (Peaceful Protest and Civil Disobediance Association) that the government would give anything to stop. However, word on the street was that it's members were taking up arms - preparing for a revolution. So much for peaceful.

Me, I agreed with what they were doing, but if they found anyone who was a part of it, you were as good as gone. I'm talking torture and threatening family and death. And this was our 'wonderful' political system. Just a bit corrupt. I would've joined, but I have a planned future.

I sat down next to her on the bench and winked. "Wouldn't tell a soul if I could," I said, smiling, "But I don't think I caught cha' name."

She grinned widely, showing her perfect, white teeth (much unlike mine). "Noodle. I'm Noodle. Laugh if you want."

Well. She certainly joined me in the weird names club.

"I'm 2D," I said, looking her straight in the eye, and I was almost embarrassed to tell her. She looked at me with a face that was smiling but the expression said, "Huh?"

"2D," she asked, "Like the number and letter?" A grin. "That's so cool. Now I don't feel so bad." She chuckled. "We could be in the PWIA or something."

"PWIA?"

"'Parents With Imagination Association.'"

We laughed, and I looked at her. Real pretty, with a blue denim jacket, black tank top underneath, blue capris ending a few inches below her knees, white shoes, and her lovely little cap. As for me, crappy t-shirt with some obscene saying, with jeans and whatever shoes I had put on. Couldn't be more unattractive. She was stylish. I was a wreck. Of course, had I known I'd be meeting some nice girl, maybe I'd clean up my act. But these things come and go as they please.

She glanced over at me. "So what are you doing here?" she asked, putting down the magazine. I had her attention.

"Just hanging out, seein' friends." Her eyes darted to the hickie again. I could feel blush starting to rise, and adjusted my jacket, covering my neck.

Haha. 2D told a little white lie. Visiting friends? Bullshit. I was killing myslef softly... with cigarettes. But maybe I'd take it easy on those, for her sake. I checked the bus schedule taped to the wall. Three more minutes. No more small talk.

"Umm, Noodle..." I said, leaning over. Why was I so embarrassed all of a sudden? This shouldn't be this hard. "Can ya sing, aw play any instruments, by any chance?"

She looked at me suspiciously. "Somewhat," she said slowly, "Why?"

"I, umm... I... Well, ya see...Okay, I know this is weird, but can ya sing sumthin' faw me?"

She hesitated, I could see it. Strangers on the street coming up and asking you random favors. Not ordinary. But she smirked and said, "If it's bad, don't make fun of me."

I never would have dreamed of it.

So she opens her mouth and sings. And god, it was... unbelievable. Professional is an understatement. And she kept her eyes narrowed on me, watching to see my reaction, and she started smiling when she saw my mouth drop. No way would I have thought someone could sing like that without editing until I heard her. It was a song I had heard on the radio she sang, but it sounded... I can't describe it. Angelic or whatever word it is. Celestial. Good enough for me to use that vocab.

And she stopped and smiled and glittered and asked, "Was that good?"

And at that moment, I decide on an instant, I am not letting this girl slip through my fingers. She's too good to be true. And I am sitting there like some dumbass turkey with it's mouth open, and she's laughing nervously and waving her hands in front of my face and going, "2D?"

And as the bus is pulling up and we stand, and we board it together, I ask slowly, "Noodle... 'ave you eva thought of singin' in a group

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A/N: More coming soon, I know this wasn't how any of it started, but pretend you never knew the Gorillaz history and imagine this is it. Eventually it feeds into the main plot of the videos. Review! 


	2. Boozin'

Chapter Two

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Disclaimer: I don't own Gorillaz.

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A/N: This chapter is one of 2D's memories (notice the italics). Review!

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_It is a hot spring day, somewhere in May, sweltering. Too hot to be spring, but it was. Thanks, global warming._

_We have a day off. Murdoc is in the backyard, in an inflata-pool with a margarita, Russel is sunbathing on the roof (or deep frying, I wasn't gonna check), and I am being smart, sitting in my room with the only air conditioner blasting, on my lazy ass on the computer, watching porn and editing music (watch me multitask, everyone!) Amazing._

_Noodle is in the kitchen, windows wide open, letting the breeze in, dancing and singing, just so happy to be alive. I remember how she was wearing a white sundress with tiny red flowers and leaves on the bottom, and an apron. How she dusted and cleaned, and she loved to do it. It was her past-time, we didn't need to ask. _

_Mine was drinking. And popping pills. But drinking tasted better. And on this particular day, I was in the mood for some, so I got down and looked under my bed, where my stash usually was. And today, it was gone._

_I race into the kitchen. Noodle had done the spring cleaning! I grab her shoulder and spin her around to face me. Maybe I was being rougher than I had tried to be, 'cause her eyes were big and she looked scared for a minute and she stopped singing. "Oh, hey, 2D-sama," she says, relaxing, "You're gonna give me a heart attack one day." She wraps her arms around me in a quick hug._

"_Noodle, did ya clean my room?"_

"_Yeah, why?"_

"_Ya stole the beer." I tried to suppress my anger._

_She shakes her head and rolls up her sleeves. "I didn't take anyone's alcohol," she says, washing a plate._

_I take her shoulder again, surprised at myself. The dish falls back into the sink with a clatter, but does not break. _

"_Seriously, now," I say, "Where is it?"_

"_I didn't take it, and I wouldn't if I could. Don't be stupid, 2D, you know I hate the stuff."_

"_But you want me ta quit! You'd take it t' get me ta stop!"_

_She spins to face me again, hair pulled back, rag in hand, hand on hips, glaring. She was beautiful._

"_Of course I do," she snaps, "But of your own accord! I'm not gonna hide your booze and vodka to make you stop! You started it, you're gonna stop it!"_

"_You're always tawking about how you're goin' ta 'elp!"_

_This must have stirred something inside of her, and with strength surprising of a fifteen year old, she takes my face in her smooth hands and forces me to loom at her. "2D. If I've ever been your friend, it's because we can trust each other. No, don't look away." She snaps my head back into place. I blush. I am being lectured by someone eight years younger than me. "I did not take your drinks."_

_And we do trust each other. A lot. She wasn't lying, and I could sense it. We could tell things like that. Angry and embarrassed, I push through the door and storm outside._

_As soon as I do, I remember it's too hot, and turn to go in, when lo and behold, there is my stash, dumped and drained and lying in the recyclables, spilled all over. Anger flares in me again. She lied! Twice! And had me going!_

_I grab a can and run in, flailing the evidence. She keeps her eyes on the dishes, and her expression says she doesn't want to see me now._

"_You liar," I say, then shout, "You did take it!"_

_Noodle wipes a bead of sweat off her forehead and looks up, tired of arguing. But when she sees what I'm holding, her face clouds with puzzlement. She takes the cans from me and stares at them, and sniffs them_

_Then she gives me the queerest look._

"_2D..." she says, "What were you thinking when you put your beer in a moldy V8 can?" _

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A/N: Well, he was probably wasted when he did, so it makes sense. 

Review!


	3. Home

Chapter Three

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Disclaimer: I don't own the Gorillaz.

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A/N: Chapter three is here! Buon appetite! 2D's POV.

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"So," I said, stepping through the door and throwing my jacket and bag on the floor, "I think I found someone." 

Murdoc actually lifted his head to look at me from the computer. Oh shit. "'ho is et, Dullard?" he asked, lifting an eyebrow too. Whoa, man. Calm down. Major movement on his part.

"Some girl called Noodle."

"Noodle, eh? 'Ow old is she?"

"Erm... Probably 14, 15, maybe 16. She didn' say."

"14? An' yer shure she can sing?"

"'Solutely. 'nd play guitar."

"Wheah is she?"

I shrugged. "At 'er house. She–"

"'er parents'?"

"'ers. She–"

"She 14 an' she got a 'ome?"

"I only guessed! She's young, that's all. Anyway," I plowed on, "she wasn't shure about coming 'ere directly, but I gave her our number and she'll call when she's ready."

Russel waddled over. "Who's calling?" he asked. Murdoc shrugged and went back to his PC.

Back to normal.

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Three days later, I was getting nervous. She hadn't called. How much time do you need to decide to be in a band? But it wasn't the being in the band part, it was the shacking-up-with-three-disturbed-male-monkeys part. 

So we waited. And, of course, when I went to go eat a banana or something (haha, that's so funny, right?), the phone rings. Russel picks up and I'm turning and mouthing for him to let me talk, and he goes, "Hello?"

"...Hello?" Noodle doesn't know who he is.

"Who is this?" Russel asks, 'cause he didn't know why I've been sitting at the reciever all day.

"Umm... Actually, I think I have the wrong number..."

"No, you don'!" I yelled, but Russel just goes "Ok," and hung up, and I was like, "No! I needed ta tawk ta 'er!" And I grabbed the phone and hit redial and prayed she pick up.

A click. "Hello?"

"..." I was waiting to hear her so much, I didn't hear her the first time at all.

"Hello?"

"...Hello, this Noodle?"

"The one and only."

"It's 2D."

You could hear her perking up on the other end. "Oh, hi! I tried calling you a minute ago... Did you give me the wrong number or something?"

"That was Russel. 'e lives 'ere, too."

"Oh, ok. So, about the singing thing... I can do it, and I'd love to... But I need a place to stay."

I paused. She wasn't afraid to stay with us if she was asking me, but did we have a place that wasn't full of shit? Well, probably. We had 49 rooms. I looked around. Yeah.

"Yeah," I said, "O' course. So when can ya come ova?"

"Today. I've been packing. I'll just take the bus over."

I made a noise that I didn't even try to. "Atchully..."

"...?"

"Tha' bus doesn't come up this way, 'nd so far as I know, it's a mile's walk to tha nearest station."

She paused, and I got afraid, 'cause she might be rethinking it. "Ok, cool," she agreed, "Give me the address."

I did, and she read me hers. "'ow 'bout I walk you 'ere," I offered, "So ya don't take a detour ta hell?"

Muds looked up at the word 'hell.'

She laughed. "Alright, I'll see you then."

I hung up and pulled on my jacket. Murdoc was eating some canned chicken and asked, " Oi, where ya goin', nob?"

And I shrugged and said, "Out. Can I borrow tha Winne?"

"No."

"Plea–"

"Nope."

"C'mon. Jus' this once."

"NO.

"I jus-"

"NO!

"Fine. Lovely friend ya are." And I left.

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It was really nice outside, spring-ish. Everythiong was growing and all the lovely squirrels were out. Walking down the increasing slope was easy, but I'd be dying when it came to walk back up, especially with luggage. 

We lived on a hill because of Muds. Well, kinda. He bought Kong Studios just because it was big and he was cheap. Later on, we made, what, maybe $500 grand at a concert, and he bought an Island. Not an actual island, but a Skyland, which is the real name for it, but it's just the Island to us.

Yeah, he was stoned when he did it, but he did. And not just an ordinary Island, but one with a lighthouse once used for government testing on it. So we all bet it was radioactive or something, but it was safe. And since we were on a hill, whenever it would float by, we'd go up to the roof and could climb on if we wanted. And that was that.

When I reached the town, I picked out Noodle's apartment and went into the lobby, up like ten flights of stairs, and down the hall. There goes me, huffing and puffing. Yeah, I should quit smoking. But it isn't that simple, y'know?

I knocked on the door and I heard footsteps scurrying around and she called, "Just a minute!" So I waited for a few minutes and then she let me in, bending over and shoving her shirts into a suitcase and smiling.

"How're ya doing, love?" I asked, and she sighed and said, "Fine, I'm just about done." She stood up. Her hair was pulled into a ponytail and she looked at all the packing she had done.

"Ok, that's it," she said, picking up a bag.

I picked up the second bag and slung her backpack over my shoulder. I noticed she had left a ton of stuff in the room. "Wot about this?" I asked, motioning to the room. She shrugged. "Not mine. My landlords'."

And I wondered, where did she get this money from?

So we left, and she pulled the door closed behind her and we started walking. Out of the apartment, into the towns, the edge of town, the road. When we got near the edge of the dirt path, she asked me, "Who lives with you?"

"Erm... We got Russel and Muds, whose real name is Murdoc."

"Muds? Three for the PWIA."

I laughed. "Yeah, you wanna wotch out faw him. 'e takes a showa a month, is an ex–"

I stop. I'm scaring her. She is silent and staring at the ground. Of course I can't tell her Muds is now an ex-speed addict and sex obsessed girlfriend stealer. Of course I can't tell her I smoke, drink, gamble, cut, am beaten by Murdoc on a regular basis, and have anorexia. Of course I can't tell her Russel saw his friends killed and was possessed. I can't tell her all this and I almost did. I barely even know her. She'll be frightened off.

But we all have something to hide.

"Nevamind. It's up this way," I said, quickly, and she didn't press it any further. Seeing how weirded-out she was, I said, "So, ya aren't leavin' any family? 'ow old are you? Is Noodle really your name?"

"Wow, " she laughed, "Questions! I'm 15, and, no. I was raised by these nurses, but they weren't my parents. They let us choose our own names, and the only word I knew in English was Noodle. One day, they just handed me a card and told me to use it if I needed money and turned us out. And then... I can't really remember. I just... lived." She stopped, and there was an awkward pause. "But I'm happy with who I've become, so it doesn't matter..."

She seemed to be talking to herself, so I asked, "You 'ave siblings?"

She looked at the trail ahead. "Oh, not really. They were with me when the people took care of us, but we weren't related at all. Is 2D _your_ real name?"

"Nah, I'm Stuart. Stuart Tusspot."

"I'll stick with 2D."

"Please do."

We stopped to take a breather, and when we began walking again, she asked, "Do you mind me asking why you live so far up here?"

"Muds bought it. It was cheap, and we needed it t' reach the Island."

"...Island?"

"Skyland."

"You have one!"

"Yeah, tha one with tha lighthouse."

Noodles' eyes were as round as grapefruit. "I've seen it!" she cried, "It's passed over a few times! That is so cool! Do you guys ever hang out up there?"

"Sometimes... It's nice t' go up when it gets too 'ot down 'ere. I can take ya up, if ya want. It's all good."

"That'll be our spot, then," she declared.

She was delighted. It was all over her face. Everything about her was readable, which could be good, or bad. We walked the rest of the way in silence, and I could see her thinking about sitting in the lighthouse and being on top of the world. When we reached the house, I kicked open the door and flung off my boots. Noodle stood, uncertain, and I motioned for her to come in, pushing aside piles of Mud's garbage.

"Don't worry, we don't use your room, it'll be cleaner than this."

She relaxed and came in. Anyone could tell three single males lived here just by looking in. I led her to her room and opened the door, 'cause that's polite. And she steps in and goes "Whoa..." like she's never seen a bedroom before. And she goes right in and sits on the bed and smiles and looks around again and says, "I'm gonna love it here."

And, me? I'm just happy to see her happy.

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A/N: Review! 


	4. Confession p1

Chapter Four

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Disclaimer: I don't own the Gorillaz.

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A/N: 2D's POV and memory. Thanks for the comments!

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_Another day in May, but so much nicer. Like spring, almost. Noodle and I are on the Island, laying in the grass. She is wearing a pink tank top and blue shorts, and me, the same, only with a long white t-shirt. Noodle points at a cloud and laughs and says, "That cloud looks like Mud's nose."_

_We laugh, and watch them go by, and I ask her, "D' ya want t' know why it's like that?" The great thing about the Island is that the grass is really long and if you lay in it, you can't see the other person over it, so you could get pretty deep in thought and you wouldn't have to look atsomeone directly. But she must've been uncomfortable by this, 'cause she sits up and looks at me from the corner of her eye. _

"_Is it something I'm not supposed to know?" she asks, cautiously. Noodle was very big on privacy and not butting into things that weren't her business._

_I sit up, too. The grass tickles. "It's jus' some'fink I hate ta think about," I admit. Noodle shakes her head fiercely_

"_No, then. I don't want you to be uncomfor–"_

"_But," I cut in, as gently as I can, "It's some'fink I **want** t' tell ya."_

_There is a silence, and I can see her debating over whether to press it or not. She puts her nervous grin on, glancing around, as if looking for backup. Her hair blows, and she brushes it out of her face and behind her ear. Should she listen to the whiney twenty-year-old, or spare his feelings?_

"_Ok," she says, very slowly, pausing again, "So tell me."_

_And I do. About the accident and my coma and Murdoc and my ex-girlfriend Paula and how Muds stole my girl and Russel caught them in stall 3 and broke Mud's nose and how we fired Paula and Muds went to the hospital and I layed in my bed for three days and cried, that the two people I respected above all would do something to me like that. And how after that, everything was different. _

_And Noodle, she was a good listener. A real good listener. Like, even if she didn't care about what you had to say, (but she always did), she'd agree and keep her eyes on you and smile and nod and take it all in without taking sides until the end._

_And when I was done, she looked at me, and her eyes were sad, but there was no pity, just compassion and wanting something... wanting to help. And she said, "2D..." In the saddest voice I've ever heard, and she leaned over and rested on my side. Her hair smelled like vanilla. "I'll make sure he never does something like that again."_

_I wanted to ask her, what can you do? You're only fifteen. He's older than me. That's more than a good ten years on you. But the confidence in her voice was promising, and the peacefulness of the moment just said no, don't rehash it._

_And she shifted against yours truly, and quietly asked, "Do you still love Paula?"_

_I glanced down at her, her eyes focused on a butterfly. "...D' **you** know what love is?" I asked back._

"_Of course I do. I'm not a child, 2D-chan. Do you still love her?"_

_I didn't know what to answer, because I had never let myself really think about her, but the answer dawned on me like a bolt of lightning. _

"_...I did. After all that, I mean. But it went away."_

"_I know it did," she said curiously, not looking at me. I stared. How could she know what it meant, how it felt, to suffer that? _

"_Wha?" I asked._

_She turned to me, and I swear, it seemed like she was giving off a glow, a sparkle, something, making her shine like the sun. And she answered my question._

"_Because anyone who hurts you in the heart and spirit cannot **ever **really love you."_

_There is an air of childhood innocence around Noodle, like someone who has never seen war or death or violence, but there was the wisdom of someone who has lived their life and experienced everything. And it was_ _coolest thing, being near her. It was the strange, hearing her talk like that, like someone older than me. _

_But not necessarily a bad thing. Not at all._

_So I layed back down, and so did she, each absorbing what had just been said. The cool grass brushing my side, her head resting on my stomach, we lay there, watching the clouds go by, until there wasn't a spot in the sky._


	5. Family

Chapter Five

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Disclaimer: I don't own the Gorillaz, sadly.

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A/N: Chapter Five is here! More fluff! WOOO! Thanks for the reviews and all attempts to get me reviews, it's very appreciated!

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By dinnertime, Noodle has her room set up and is already starting to clean the hallways. LYK WHOAMYGOD WE HAVE A RED CARPET. 

The good thing about her is that, aside from her being a jackpot of unseen talent, she's very fruitful. She gets the job done once she sets to it, which is great, no matter what career (unless she's an assassin or something). Problem is, Noodle has her ways and we have ours and she was not familiar with them, such as when dinner comes around, we take our food and go to our own rooms. Not anymore. Although the pizza had already been ordered, there'd be no more "isolation-dining," as she put it.

Muds, Russel, and I found ourselves being yanked from our rooms (Noodle has every square foot of the house memorized in five seconds, from the space behind the toilet to the closet in my closet) and dragged to the dining room to be seated. The doorbell rang, Noodle practically threw the money in the delivery guy's face, and opened the box in the center of the table.

Slapping Russ' outreached hand away from the delicious pie, she rationed out pieces, then took everyone's requests for drinks. Her seat was next to mine, and Murdoc, who took an instant 'liking' to her, punched me sharply when she went into the kitchen and told me to switch seats with him. I thought about saying no, but after the third punch I gave in and moved. Noodle wasn't pleased. (You should've seen the look on her face when she came back in. I think she was ready to dump that soda on his filthy head.)

"Ok," she said, taking her own seat, "I just need to see everyone here, but I don't care much for table manners, so go crazy."

So she and Russel started talking (Russel _still_ did not know exactly who she was or why she was here), with annoying little remarks from Muds ever so often, who was getting mad she wasn't loving him at first sight, and I sat, saying nothing, poking at my pizza. So when Noodle stops talking, she looks over at me like a parent who thinks their child has a fever and goes, "2D, what's wrong?"

I open my mouth to say something and Muds goes, "Oh, 'e neva talks. Shy as a baby, ain't that right, ache face? nd' he's got an eattin' problem, 'e does–"

But Noodle makes this noise like clearing her throat and Murdoc shuts up (thank god) and looks at her and she says, "Gomen, Murdoc-sama, but I think if 2D-chan has something to tell me, he'd want to tell me. And he can tell me whenever he wants. I don't need a translator."

And Muds is taken aback, like whoa, you just got served. Or maybe he just doesn't understand bits of Japanese like I do. But he thinks she's hot, and won't kick her out or yell at her, so in the tiniest voice I've ever heard from him, he mutters, "Sorry, love," and sits there and sulks.

And to spite him, I take a small bite from the tip of the pizza, and Noodle smiles, pleased. And it's not from the fact that I'm eating.

So our dinner went on like that. After, Noodle brought out her guitar and started playing, only the tip of the iceberg of her ability, a demo video game, but everyone was really happy because what they had seen was good. So Murdy, trying to stay on her good side now, told her she could play and sing, if she wanted. How very generous.

* * *

That was the night Noodle found out my secret... one of those things I hadn't wanted to tell her just yet.A secret that involved razors, knives, any sharp objects, if you get my drift. It was late, zombies already well into their parading around, and as I came down from the bathroom to get a glass of sparkling water, she was there, watching telly from the bar and eating potato chips. 

"What're you doing up?" she asked, and I smiled and asked, "No, what're **you** doin' up?" And before she could answer, she saw my bleeding arm and was like, 'Oh my god, what happened, 2D-san?"

"Err... I don't...know, I guess... I...yeah," I stuttered, like a dumbutt and she grabbed my arm (like I said before, she is REALLY strong) and eyed it and said grimly, "This is a razor cut."

Haha. So little Noods could tell. But it wasn't half as bad as some of the stuff I've done. And she stared at me coldly and wouldn't let my arm go, or maybe I just have no muscle. She stared at me and came to the conclusion.

"Don't tell me you..."

And I shrugged and she glared and said darkly, "You're intolerant to... how many things? More then fifteen? You don't eat meat, only chicken? You barely eat what you can! Do you know how hard it is to supply the blood that keeps you here with m— us?"

Did she almost say what I thought she said?

And I made a weak attempt to stand up for myself. "It's only a drop..."

But she pressed a towel to the wound and I saw it was much more than that.

And she warned me. "I'm only fifteen and _I_ can tell you you are going down the wrong path. And I'm not talking about saving souls or any of that, just plain old I-don't-want-to-be-in-a-band-with-a-bunch-of-life-ruiners! We aren't cutters, we're a family!"

So I looked at her and she bristled, but she was sad, too. And suddenly I felt bad, because this is what we had asked for, a girl to bring us together and make us better, and here I was, fucking it up.

And I shook my head and said, "Noodle... There is a lot I 'aven't told ya, an' I'm sorry. But Muds was right, I do 'ave an eattin' problem, an' a ton more, as ya can see. We all do, nd' I wanted ta tell ya earlier, but I thought ya'd be scared."

Noodle looked at me, and I felt a connection to her, like an electromagnet. This was the girl meant to save us, to help us _and_ our careers. We were a family, a family with a new member, and saving souls or not, that's what she was doing. Only fifteen She hugged me, the first time she ever had, and said, "So let me help you."

And no doubt, she could, and would.


	6. Never

Chapter Six

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own Gorillaz.

* * *

A/N: Ah, reviews! Danke! I have responded to a select few of them. Also, if you can't tell, every other chapter is a memory, like this one, until the end. To stop confusion, the whole story runs from March to July, and all the memories are scattered around in there, and they are not posted in order. 2D's POV. Kind of short.

* * *

_April_

* * *

_A warm, sunny day, probably the second week in April. Russel is cooking, and burning, lunch, Muds is sleeping, and Noodle and I are on the Island, chillin'. Our spot. We are talking about anything that comes to mind, everything under the sun. She is wearing a sundress Muds calls the teapot dress, although why, I don't know. It is short and puffs out a bit, maybe that's why? I am in my usual garb._

_Noodle sits on the very edge of the island, strumming her guitar while I hum along, planning how we are to make one of the songs for our new album. When she puts it down, she sighs. "I love it up here. It's always so nice."_

_I nod, looking on like a parent. She's kind of my responsibility, y'know? I brought her to the group, we bonded, it's my job. She's mine to take care of. No strings attached._

_She dangles her feet over the edge, a few loose stones and dirt tumbling to their earthy grave. Danger zone. I scoot over, closer to her, ready to spring at a moment's notice... just in case. She glances over and sees me all tensed and looks away and laughs, a belting kind of laugh I've never heard her make. Like a bark."Don't worry," she says, motioning me over, "I don't ever lose my balance."_

"_Ya neva' know..."_

"_I do." Again, her confidence reassures me, but the voice in my head said to be careful, she doesn't have the better judgement. Actually, she **does.** I sigh._

"_Ah, this is so cool!" she exclaims, stretching her arms highabove her head, "This island, the whole place, being with you guys, and how I can get so close and never fall off." Noodle truley did love the simple things in life, things I would never in a million years notice or pick out._

_I grin. "Don' jump, then."_

_She stands up and looks me straight in the eye. I feel a tingle down my back, like she zapped me with an electric current. _

"_I never would."_

_She is standing at the very edge, the VERY edge. She's testing me. Knowing she can't scare herself, she's trying it on me. _

_Well, it's working._

_Her hair blows, and she peers over the edge, eyeing it like she's fixing to free fall. _

"_The only way you could get me away from this place," she mutters, and pauses. "...You'd have to **kill** me."_

"_Well," I quote, "Once ya're in the Gorillaz, ya stay in it faw life..." But my heart begins to thump. She's going to--_

_Suddenly, the rock under her feet gives way. A flash, and the stone is falling, falling, crumbling... and Noodle is gone. I hear myselfscream, and run to the edge. _

_"NOODLE!"_

_She isn't there._

"_2D...?"_

_I spin around, my heart pounding in my chest. Tears begin to pop into my eyes, and adrenaline pumps through my veins. Noodle is standing behind me, unfazed, not showing really any emotions except for the 'Huh?' look. I wonder if she had even blinked when the rock slipped._

_I grab her, shivering. Suddenly my legs are weak. No time for explanations. She places a hand against my chest, uncertainly._

"_What're ya thinking! Ya coulda died!"_

"_I told you, 2D-ku', I never fall off. All I have to do is take a step back."_

" _Ya tryna give me a 'eart attack? Don' eva pull summfink like tha' again, unnerstand?" I breathe, trying to calm down._

"_Sorry you're upset..."_

_I gather my breath. "Whateva," I say, and let her go, "An' I'm not upset." Of course not._

"_You're such a liar! Feel the way your heart is beating."_

_And, looking back, I wonder - Was fear the only thing making it?_


	7. Night

Chapter Seven

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own Gorillaz.

* * *

A/N: Keep reading, keep reviewing, keep getting chapters! This one's longer, pay careful attention to the details, they all mean something.

* * *

I lay in my bed that night, with my bandaged arm lying next to me, pulsing painfully. Noodle had told me to keep pressure on it, along with warning me she'd kick my ass so bad I'd have no blood left to bleed if I did it again, and it stung like a thousand fire ants. Well, it was what I deserved, I guess. 

I rolled over, and the sheet caught on my foot. Lately, little Noods had been taking up a lot of my mind. I mean, a _lot _of it. Was that normal? I hoped so. I wouldn't want people thinking of me as some sick-ass perv going after his bandmates.

I tried to change topics and think of the upcoming album. We had some pretty good songs, but only eight or nine - it wasn't enough.

A newspaper lying on the floor caught my eye. It was Noodles', one of her anti-government papers. She had been in here earlier, reading it while she waited for me to wake up. I reached over, not bothering to get off the bed, and picked it up. Flipping it open to a random page, I scanned the article, which showed giant pictures of a building covered by canvas and tarpaulin, hidden from view all around.

"_...So far," says Maria Dover, Head Officer of the PPCDA, "All we know is that the project is mandatory, destructive, and is titled **Feel Good Inc**."_

I paused, read it, reread it, and stared at that one phrase.

Feel Good Inc.

It had a nice sound to it, but there was something about it hidden, like a subliminal message - it gave off a bad vibe. Anything that demands a happy feeling isn't good.

Feel Good Inc. I should ask Noodle for more of her newspapers.

Damn. And there I went again, my thoughts returning to her.

Okay. Sleeping was not going to work, obviously.

I sat on the edge of the bed, gathering myself, and went down the hall. There were no sounds from her room, but I knew she was awake and listening for something, too.

I knocked. Even though no words were said in the first place, a hush fell. Then, the door creaked open. Noodle peered out in the darkness, cautiously.

"2D-sama?" She asked. There was tiredness in her voice.

"Wha's tha' Feel Good Inc?"

She stared at me like I found out her greatest secret. A pause. "Come in here," she said, yawning and motioning me inside. I crept in. She closed the door behind me.

She sat down on her bed and took the paper from my hand.

"You read this?" she asked gravely. I nod, feeling like a puppy who's peed all over the floor and the master's coming home.

Noodle sighs, exasperated. She flops onto the bed. "This isn't good."

"It was in me room," I say, "I jus' picked it up an'-"

"No, it's not your fault. I shouldn't have left it lying around... God, this isn't– promise me you won't tell ANYONE you saw this. Promise."

"I promise. Can ya tell me wha' Feel Good Inc is?"

Noodle takes a breath. It's obvious she'd rather forget this whole thing, but I'm not letting her off the hook that easy, especially now that she's acting like it's the end of the world.

"It's a project," she explains, "Started by the government to achieve absolute control over it's people in a so-called constitutional way. Basically, you get locked up into this Feel Good tower and held there until everything anti-gov has been weeded out and destroyed."

"Like Rapunzel," I say, "Y'know wif the 'air an' tha' tower..." and if there was a list of things NOT to say at this time, that'd be number one. Noodle glared.

"That's what I'm against," she snapped, "To try and stop it before it starts. You know why I'm in danger? Because if they find my name, it will be a matter of hours before they kill everyone in this home, on the spot."

I feel my heart in my throat. I'm getting nervous, but she can't know that. "Death don' sound so scary if ya think 'bout it," I stutter, but it's pretty clear how I really feel.

Noodle shrugs. "Death doesn't scare me," she says, and then, "Only what happens after it."

"Like 'eaven an' 'ell?" I ask. I am not sure what she's getting at.

She shakes her head. "No," she mutters, "Not where I go... what I become..."

I did not understand, as usual.

"D'ya b'leve in 'eaven?" I ask, curious. Noodle doesn't seem like the religious type.

"No," she says, sounding lighter, "Reincarnation. I'm Buddhist."

"Yer Buddhist?"

"Yeah, why?"

"So 'm I!"

"Really? You aren't kidding?"

"Not a' all. Were ya tawkin' 'bout reincarnation, then?"

"What do you mean?" she asked, tilting her head, confused.

"When ya said ya 're gonna beome summfink afta' life."

Noodle gives me the strangest look, and I still don't understand what she means. "No... I wasn't talking about reincarnation, either."

Suddenly, I realize why we connect like that, or I make one of my '2D-theories' - we have a Zen bond or something like that. That's the reason Muds and Russ... or maybe just Muds, can't see what we see in Noodle, or find anything special about her. They don't connect, they repel.

She yawns suddenly, signaling the end of our talk. I look at her Armageddon clock, forget how to tell time for a few minutes, then figured out at least thirty minutes had passed since I came in.

"Errmm, I'm tired," she groaned, pushing me towards the door, "I have to get changed. Out. Now."

I backed up, stepping outside the doorway, when she kissed my cheek. It caught me off guard, although, I had to say, it wasn't bad. Really soft lips. She had to stand on her tiptoes and it was just a peck, but that didn't really matter 'cause I felt my face heating like a furnace. Noodle scanned my expression, and a smirk appeared. Zen bond. She knew exactly what she was doing.

"My, how red we are," she observed, trying to suppress a smile, and closed the door on me.

It wasn't a rejection.

It was an invitation.


	8. The Tomorrow

Chapter Eight

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own the Gorillaz.

* * *

A/N: This chapter is a really short memory, I don't have a lot of time to write, and not a lot to write about, but after this the chapters get really long. Be careful, some important information's been hidden in here. Take your notes!

* * *

_Noodle and I sit in the recording studio, listening to the two new tracks we have just made. One of them is Feel Good Inc._

_Noods, she wasn't very happy when I told her I wanted to use that name for it. "It's too dangerous," she said, "You go public with that single, the gov will be all over us." But when she listened to it closely, she shrugged and said, "You're the singer. Do what you wish. But I will not have a part in this track."_

_"But ya 'afta! It ain' good witout ya," I persisted._

_She shook her head. "I will not sing this song."_

_"Not even play?"_

_She must have seen my downcast face 'cause she paused and was like, "Well.." She rubs her chin. "Not sing. Play, maybe. Just because I'm nice like that."_

_"Awww," I say, hugging her tightly, "Thankies, love. Ya don' know 'ow much it means ta me."_

_Noodle lets herself be smooshed in the hug. "Well," she says, "I'm doing it for you, not the song."_

_She points to the computer, reading the disk. "Two files," she announces, then looks at me, her face puzzled, "Is that, like, the even more acoustic version or something?"_

_I smile. It was a song I made without anyone knowing... and she will be the first to find out._

_"Is that what you've been spending all your time on in your room?" she asks. I nod. "It's all computer?" she pressed. Another nod. Satisfied, she crosses her arms and leans back in the chair. "Alright. Let's hear it."_

_I click the track and press the tiny 'play' arrow. Silence, then a noise. It is a soft beeping, like raindrops falling. Noodle listens, arms still crossed, but it's easy to tell she's all ears._

_I sit, awkward. What am I supposed to do, get up and sing along? And I can't start talkin' to her and explain the lyrics when they pop out. In fact, I heard the first lines in a dream, and I wrote it down because somehow I always end up with pills in my dreams and this one didn't have any._

_Which was weird. There had been the Island and wind and something bright and something very shiny but it fell when I was close enough to see it and there was death. So I woke up crying._

_Not screaming, not panting. Crying._

_I hadn't said it was pleasant._

**_'Summer don't know me no more. Eager man, that's all._**

**_Summer don't know me no more, just let me love in my sea.'_**

_It was pretty. And it haunted me. And even sorta traumatized me. Like, when I woke up, I didn't want to live anymore. So I sat there for a few days and layed in my bed and then on the third day I was starving I got up and ate and the dream was still with me._

_And I thought, **God, I gotta do something about this. It's gonna kill me.**_

_And then, when I wrote it down, it was gone. Totally cleared, and I probably would've forgotten about it if I hadn't been wanting to think about it._

_Funny thing is, I had the dream the day Noodle came to the house. And when I was crying, a picture of her popped into my head._

_A picture of her, screaming._

_Guess I forgot to mention that, didn't I?_

_Anyway, the song had come to a close while I was thinking, but Noodle hadn't said a word. Not a single word. She sat in the chair, staring blankly at the computer, like it had reached out and smacked her._

_"Noods?" I asked._

_She looked at me in a sweet awe._

_"That was really pretty," she said, a funny look coming over her, "It's sad..."_

_"Yeah, it's meant ta be."_

_"But isn't it a love song," she says, suddenly. Not a question. "A love song of someone going away. Is that not the point?"_

_"Yes," I say, "Of som'ne goin' away an' leavin' the otha one behind."_

_"Does it have a name?"_

_"No' unless ya count Track 2."_

_"I'll name it, "she stated, "...Manana. No... El Manana."_

_"Wha' does that mean?"_

_"The Tomorrow."_

_She stares at me._

_"Maybe one day she'll come back."_


	9. Migraines

Chapter Nine

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own Gorillaz.

* * *

A/N: Here is the start of the long chappies I had promised. I may not update for a while, I need to recover from this. Enjoy. -poof-

* * *

A few months passed. We were getting into May, when Noodle asked us if she could record her own song, and we were like, "Sure, why not?" Because it only does good, and she deserved it, putting up with us. And Noodle, she listens to rock and pop and classical and everything, but when we asked her what type she was thinking of, she said, "Something funky."

And that was that.

She wanted to keep her song a secret. Whenever I'd try to listen in, she'd somehow know and stop whatever she was doing until I went away. I don't know how she figured this out, and you can be sure I checked for some sort of camera or motion sensor, but there was nothing. She just knew.

She told us not to take offense, though. _No one_ was hearing her track until she was done with it. "After all," she'd say, wagging her finger, "You made El Manana without me knowing." So I gave up.

That night, I lay in my bed, dreaming. No, nightmaring. Noodle was on the Island. A man's voice said, "We should kill her." He flicked out a switchknife. I did not see his face, on the blade. Suddenly, she glanced up. Her face was filled with terror, a terror I have never seen before.

I woke up gasping, and a strage thought passed through my head.

'_She knows what's going to happen,'_ said a small, dark voice inside me, _'Ask her. She knows.'_

Ask her what? How could I go up to someone and ask them if they know someone wants to kill them? I can barely get up the courage to ask where the hell we are when we go on road trips, but asking someone if they know that someone is out to get them _in a dream_? 'Solutly not.

It was just a dream, I consoled. No one was going to lay a finger on her while she was here, or anywhere, for that matter. Not while I was around. Parental responsibility, right?

_Was_ I right? I wasn't sure anymore. My thoughts had become Noodle-obsessive.

'No,' said the angel, 'you are just keeping an eye out for her, like a brother. There is nothing.'

'Ah,' said the devil, 'But are you sure? Because, as I recall, you loved her when you first saw her. You thought she was hot. Has that really changed?'

'Just friends, 2D, that's all you are.'

'A friend with a crush...'

'Only children have crushes!'

'Then he deeply admires her, respects her, enjoys her company, and wishes she was single..."

Wait a minute. Isn't she single?

My disorganized mind races. She isn't single? Why wouldn't she say so? Who does she like? How do I know she's dating? How come she hasn't brought him over? What's his name? WHY AM I WORRYING ABOUT THIS SO MUCH?

Okay, relax. Let's think this through before I do something I'll hate myself for later. I was giving myself a migraine.

Was it just parental protectiveness? No. I wasn't her parent, and it wasn't because I was older. Noodle had attracted me since the moment I met her, but that was attraction... this was something different. A feeling. She had done something to me so far beyond where age mattered... Where was the line drawn between friendship and... love?

"Stop it, 'D," I thought, "She may be nice an' stuff, but yer an adult. Ya can't love 'er."

'She holds you by your very dreams,' said the devil, who was becoming my best friend, 'You like her and you know it. So just go say something.'

'You're too old!'

'She's a butterfly. Catch her."

I stood up. Noodle was driving me mad and she didn't even know it. It was time to do something. I opened the door and made my way into the hallway, waiting patiently for the elevator. It took so long that I decided I could've been halfway up before it came, and as I reached the top of the stairs the annoying contraption shouted, "It's THERE!" at me and binged open. So.

I hopped in, slammed a button, and traveled up to the third floor. Just as I stepped out –

"2D?"

I nearly fainted or had a stroke or something. Noodle was halfway down the hall, a tiny sliver of light catching her eyes and glinting in the darkness. She stared in disbelief, but then relaxed and trotted over.

I rubbed my eyes. Which were beginning to hurt. "Noods? Whatcha doin' up a' this 'our?"

She scratched her head. "I know I sound silly," she said, "But there are... _things_... outside." She probably imagined she was going crazy.

She was talking about the zombies. One little thing I had forgotten to mention.

"C'mere," I said, motioning her closer. We were near Russ' room and if you wake him up, start digging.

She stepped foward, and I saw she was holding a long, slim sword.

Holy. Shit. An actual sword. In our house. She was coming towards me, but I held out a hand and stuttered nervously "—But _before_ ya do," I said, and pointed at the blade, "Wot is that?"

Noodle stopped and inspected the sword, as if there might be some dirt on it. She held it up straight down her forehead like a samurai and it glinted in the moonlight. "This?" she asked, "It's a katana. _My_ katana. You never seen one before?"

I shook my head dumbly. That's me.

"Well, I'm not about to do any slicing-and-dicing, so don't worry. But what I am worried about, and the reason I brought this, is because you have things in your backyard."

She stood there, waiting for an answer. We could hear the howling and moaning quite clearly.

"Erm... well, they're... umm..." I started. What was the best way to explain to a little girl that you lived on a haunted burial ground where zombies pranced every night?

"Are they like, monsters?" she asked, watching the ceiling.

"Umm, not exactly... they're kinda, umm... zombies?"

The truth always wins. I hope.

"...Zombies."

"Yep."

"...Are you serious?"

She looked at me like a piece of poo on the sidewalk. Typical.

"Neva been maw."

Suddenly, she gets a weird grin. "That's cool. They can't get in here, right?"

Did she say it was 'cool'?

Whoa. Fearless at Fifteen, I suppose.

I guess they can, if they want to." I look out the window. "Thing is, they don' ezactly want to..."

"Ok, good. But maybe one day I'd like to go out and kick their asses. Just for fun," she added, winking.

"I'm shure ya would, love. Wanna tell me 'ow many maw weapons I need ta watch out faw?"

"Not that many," she started (Good God, there were more? I had been kidding!), "An axe, another katana, numchucks... switchblade, shuriken stars, razor disks..."

Ok. Switchblades I could handle. As for the rest, I'd try to stay on her good side.

Suddenly, before I could respond, the migraine hit, like a bullet to the brain. There had been plenty of warning signs, but like an idiot, I had ignored them all. Not even taken a Tylenol. Bam. A shuriken star in the eye couldn't have felt worse. The familiar sensation of being about to vomit arose in the pit of my stomach.

"Oh, god," I moaned, sliding onto my knees to the floor. Noodle knelt next to me, in an instant, at my side.

"2D-sand? Are you okay? You are paling."

I was going to be sick, I knew it. If I opened my eyes, there'd be too much light and I'd throw up anyway. The bathroom was just down the hall, but I was blind.

"Noodle...I'm gonna be..." I murmured, trying to keep my mouth closed. Dizziness pain... so much pain...

Noodle knew what I was trying to get across. She took me by the elbow and hoisted me up and led me down the hall with an arm slung over her shoulder and steered me into the bathroom. I reached a stall and heaved. Too much pain.

She was not disgusted. 'Throwing up was something I saw everyday,' she explained to me afterward, but this is not afterward. This is not, and I was puking in a stall and she was stroking my back and rubbing my shoulders and wiping my mouth with a tissue.

When I stopped, I noticed the lights were on. Too weak to talk, I tried to point. She got up and flicked them off for me. It was hard to breathe.

Noodle helped me to my feet. I was weak as a baby deer, and she led me back to the elevator and to my bedroom. I felt another wave of nausea sweep over. No...

But she did not take me back to the bathroom. She kicked open the door of my dark, messy bedroom and stumbled over a pile of clothing. _"Aii, kuso!"_ she cried, shoving it aside. She sat me down on my bed and touched my forehead and brushed my hair out of my eyes.

"Ok, I'm gonna try to fix this," she said, "It's a migraine, right?"

I nodded, sending a jolt of pain through the back of my neck. I was dying.

"This may hurt a bit," she said. Oh well. It couldn't be worse than what I was feeling now.

_(WARNING: DO NOT **EVER **TRY THIS. YOU COULD GET SERIOUSLY HURT.)_

I couldn't argue. Gently, her fingers glided through my hair until she found my ears. Placing her thumbs over them, her fingers traced the small indents that were my temples. Suddenly, she pressed them together, so hard it made my ears pop. I could feel her pulse against my skin. There was no pain yet that I wasn't already having. I liked her touch.

"Goodnight, 2D-sama," she whispered suddenly, and pressed. She smelled like... snuggle.

"Wha–?" I started, but had no time to finish. The pain was... excruciating. I wanted to scream, but no sound came out. Pressure, pressure in my head, I was dying... she was killing me and my vision blurred and went foggy and dark and Noodle wasn't there anymore.

* * *

When I woke up, my first thought was, 'Why the bloody 'ell are tha lights on?" I groaned and rolled over and my head hurt. Not a lot, and not from the migraine. From Noodle's 'treatment.'

Boosh. There she was all of a sudden, sitting on me, hugging me in a glomp. Full of energy, smiling. "2D! Are you feeling better?"

"Uhh, yeah, kinda... Wot the 'ell didya do ta me, Noods?"

"Tapped your pressure points. Made you black out. A mite too hard, and I could've killed you, a mite to soft and you'd be puking up your organs next. Good thing I'm an expert at it, eh?"

Yeah. Good thing. I'd have to be careful when I got sick. "Uhm, yeah."

I felt sick again, the aftermath of the migraine. Noodle saw me turning green and reached for the wastebasket. I realized as I hurled I didn't have a shirt on. Yup.

Somehow, she summoned up a glass of water and dumped it down my parched throat. Instantly, I could feel something breaking up in my head, something clearing. On solid ground again. Noodle could work miracles.

Russel peered in the doorway, holding more water and some Advil. "He okay, Noodle?" he asked, concerned. Noodle nodded, but took the tray from him and waved him away. "Yes, Russel-ku', but give him some time. Migraines are a hard test of strength."

"Ya're tha one wit tha strength," I said.

"You're the one with the migraine."

So I lay there and Russel closed the door and I looked around. Noodle had pushed to chairs together, bless her, and made a tiny bed in the corner.

"Didja sleep in 'ere all night, love?" I asked, drowsy.

"Yeah... You were pretty sick, y'know."

"Yeah, but they're commonplace faw me."

"Oh, really? Well now you know who to call when it bothers you. But if my teaching is correct, you won't have another for maybe... four months? At least."

Four. Fucking. Months. Without. Migraines. No words could describe how grateful I was feeling. I hugged her tightly, as I tight as I could in the state I was in.

She made a tiny, "oh," and hugged me back. She probably saw my K.F.C. and 23 scars, but if she did, she didn't care. She smelled so good, like almond and vanilla and cinnamon and cream and sugar and honey... Her scent.

She rested her head on my shoulder.

"Go out with me."

The words seemed to revert and echo around the room, and a hundred years flew by before I found myself pulling away, staring at her blushing face. Cute, but...

"._..What?"_

She smiled furiously, and blushed brighter than the sun and squirmed. "Go out with me," she repeated, "After you stop throwing up, I mean."

"I..."

"Do it, and something great will happen. I don't know what, but it'll be awesome and you'll be happy and I'll make something great happen. It'll be amazing and everything. I promise."

I stared at her. Was she serious? I was not upset, sure as hell not upset, happy, delighted, even, but she was a child! God knows everyone would see us and start saying horrible things...

'You're bandmates,' said the devil, 'No one would suspect it, and you can use that as an excuse to be with her a lot.'

'Don't do it! She's eight years younger than you!'

But the second voice was being drowned out.

A long, dormant feeling suddenly shifted inside of me. Noodle was cute, nice, sweet... still hot. But I had the feeling I was doing something wrong. I liked her. A lot. That was safe to say, and hiding things from yourself is unhealthy. How much damage could a date or two do?

"I..." I began, "I can't."

The words slipped. Noodle, if she was upset, did not show it.

"Why?" she asked, not sad, but curious.

"I... you... ya jus' a kid. It's wrong by law or summ'fink."

And she slid foward abruptly, pressing herself on me, and stared into my eyes. Through her sweet hair lay two shiny, dark, reflecting eyes... and I could've sworn there were specks of green but maybe I was seeing things.

"2D..." she breathed, "Age is two things. A number and a barrier."

Her nose skinned mine softly, and her eyes glinted darkly.

"Break it down."

She knew what I wanted to say. We were connected. I looked at her and she looked at me and I said, "Awright."

And the tension was gone and she hugged me and smiled and had an expression that was so purely happy I can't even describe it. Serenely happy. "Yes," she breathed, closing her eyes, savoring the words like a fine wine and loved the sound of them on her tongue.

And that was how me and Noodle went, breaking down barriers and ruling the world.


	10. Gardens

Chapter Ten

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Disclaimer: I don't own Gorillaz.

* * *

A/N: Generally, the memories will be short, but this one's medium. I didn't get a lot of reviews for the last chapter, maybe the reviewers tried that pressure point thing that I told them not to and died? Well, here's another one.

* * *

_June_

* * *

_"Noodle, have ya eva thought of plantin' a garden?"_

_It's a new month, by the name of June. The weather becomes more humid by the day. Noods and I have been going out for a month and a week. I keep track on my calendar with a heart and a line going through each day. Muds just thinks I'm dating someone. He doesn't notice our moods have changed from down and depressed to euphoric._

_Good for him._

_We were on the Island again when I asked her this. She wore black shorts and knee-high black boots and an obnoxiously purple shirt with pink writing on it that blared - "DON'T MAKE FUN OF THIS COLOUR." Yup. She knew._

_"Gardening? I've done it before, why?" she asked. She was sitting in my lap, and up until now, allowing herself to be hugged._

_"Tha's a lotta space up 'ere," I said, motioning around, "'Ow'd ya like it if I gave ya a garden ta take care of?"_

_"Really? That'd be awesome. Could I come up here everyday, d'ya think?"_

_"Sure."_

_"You'd let me do that?"_

_"Yah, why wouldn't I?"_

_"I'd be up here without you."_

_"...So?"_

_"It's our spot! Did you forget?"_

_I paused. "Is tha'a hint aw summfink?"_

_"No, I just wanted to know whether you could resist following me or not." She grinned._

_"Wha' kinda question is that?"_

_"Can you?"_

_"O' course."_

_"No, you can't."_

_"Yes I can!"_

_"Try it."_

_"Ok, I will." And with that, she turned and ran towards the lighthouse. 'Stay put, D,' I told myself, as I watched her skip inside. I sit tight, practically forcing myself to grab the grass. Why is this so hard? Give her some freedom! You've always let your other girlfriends go out by themselves... But then, look what's happened to them._

_I hear laughter floating from the window and up the stairwell as I 'casually' walk inside._

_She is halfway up the rusted metal spiral staircase, grinning down triumphantly, perched up in the deep windowsill. The rotors of the windmill creaked slowly outside, carelessly, but the sound had been magnified in here._

_"Sucker," Noodle laughs, but the whirring wooden gears catch her attention and she looks up. We watch them, and even to this day, I am not sure what keeps them turning - there was not a breeze to be seen and still it went. Solar power? Maybe. But it was all wooden and brick. That was the secret of it... And where this piece of land had come from. It was a rarity in our world to have something this clean and taken care of._

_"Can I go up there?" Noods asked, cautiously, and I didn't blame her. It looked like it would crumble in any minute, and I would've thought so myself, had I not been there before._

_"Yeah," I said, "Jus' don get too close ta it. Ya don wanna get caught an' loose an amm."_

_We climbed up, the noise a loud churning and creaking, and we reached the to of the stairs and sat on the platform. Into one wall was another dirty window covered with dead bugs and dirt and grime. The platform was big enough for about four people to lay on. Noodle stared out the window, squinting._

_"It's so nice out," she comments, "Where does Murdoc go on a day like this?"_

_"In the Winnebago."_

_"No..." She stared at me in disbelief._

_"Yup."_

_"He can't..."_

_"He does."_

_"That's disgusting! Days like this one don't always come by!"_

_"Ya can't talk sense ta Muds. Theah's neva been a sussessful attempt."_

_"Maybe I'll try, then. Talk sense to the fool and he'll call you foolish, maybe, but talk sense with a fist and maybe he'll be more open minded."_

_"Using force?"_

_"I'll have to."_

_She rubbed her arm. I watched her. "Wha' makes ya so strong?" I asked, a question that had been on my mind for some time now._

_Noodle shrugged, but her eyes said something else entirely. "I guess I just... am." She rolled up her sleeve and flexed her muscle. There was almost nothing there, but she grabbed my shoulder and I could feel that wasn't true._

_"I guess dislocationing me shoulda'll teach me not ta mess wit you," I said, sharp pain twisting and whipping through my bones. It was all I could do not to gasp or scream._

_Noodle let go and grinned apologetically._

_"Oh, crap, I'm sorry! Didn't mean to hurt you!" She rubbed the sore spot, which lessened the pain, and I could feel the embarrassed heat from her face. "I can't believe I just did that..."_

_"Noods, what're ya hidin?"_

_The question sprung out from me like water from a broken hose. I had meant it as a joke, but the silence that fell told me I had touched on something._

_She glanced at me, pressed three fingers to my head, and lay me down. Her actions were rushed, and she was nervous. "I think the pain's making you a little weird," she said, "You lie down. No more talking."_

_"Noodle..." I protested. I wasn't crazy! The pain was gone, why would that even make me think strange. "Noodle, I jus'..."_

_She stared at me, the whirring gears turning behind her._

_"In time, 2D-cha', in time..."_

_We sat there, or, I layed there, neither of us knowing what to do._

_I got up, propping myself on my elbows. She was zoning out, staring off into some place that didn't exist to me... I wanted her back._

_"Is summ'fink wrong?"_

_It took her a while to respond. She seemed to be coming out of a sleep. She mumbled something in Japanese then turned to me._

_"No, no. Nothing's wrong, I just... I was just wondering."_

_"'bout what?"_

_"Things."_

_"Wha' things?"_

_"Like, if I should kiss you."_

_I had thought she was joking._

_And then she leaned foward on top of me and kissed me, pressing herself on me, and I knew she had been planning this and was going to all along, but didn't, and I thought, "Let us live in our wrongness if we are happy," and I kissed her back. And some people would say it's disgusting because we're both ordinary people (who maybe aren't so ordinary) who love each other very much, and they could tell me to go back to one of my old girls or Paula or find someone new, but I wouldn't._

_And now this was between me and Noodle and there was no regretting and I'd never go back to Paula and I'm done thinking about her because I've wasted enough of my life and mind on her and it's done. Look what she's done to me, and look how Noodle's fixing it._

_And plain and simple, that's that._


	11. Confession p2

Chapter Eleven

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Disclaimer: I don't own Gorillaz.

* * *

A/N: Ok, summer. I've had a MAJOR writer's block for this chapter, and this chapter alone.So, guess what I did? I turned it into ANOTHER memory! So you've got two mems in a row, and I want reviews. Rawr.

* * *

_Noodle released her single, DARE! in June. It was one of the coolest songs on our album. As a reward, I took her on a round-trip on the Island, something we had never gotten to do before._

_We packed our bags, bade our farewells to Murdoc and Russel, and climbed aboard our spot, with it's trees and flowers and grass and windmill. Us, with our gallons of water and matches and sleeping bags and lanterns and bugspray and clothes and radio. When all is done, she unties the rope and pushes off, and the trip begins._

_The week in the air was fun, but it was the last day that really left an impression on me. It shaped me around a different person than the Noodle I had thought I knew._

_The last day. We were heading back, the Island's cycle complete. Sunset falling, day's last, weak, golden rays of light struggling to stay afloat amidst the rapid approaching night. There is a cool breeze, but some heat from the afternoon stays around, making me uncomfortably warm in my shirt. If Noodle is hot, she doesn't show it._

_Kong is coming in to view, and I stand and prepare to drop the anchor, though we have a ways to go. Noodle is lying under the branches of a thick willow, watching life go on around her and not saying a word. She shifts, glancing around._

_"Ya okay?" I ask, catching her eye._

_She nods, but the look on her face is something else. "2D-ku', remember how I said I wanted to tell you something?"_

_"Yeah?"_

_"Well... I think I can now."_

_I stop. Suddenly, it doesn't really matter how close Kong is or how I need to pack. We could spend another month here, a year here, if that's the time she takes to tell me. There's a hopeful expression on her face - I owe her an ear, too._

_I decide against questioning further, but sit down next to her. She smiles, but won't look straight at me._

_"I once told you I was raised by nurses. When you threw up, I said I saw people throwing up everyday. Do you know what that means?" Her voice was omnious, and there was something dark growing in the air. All of a sudden, I wasn't so eager to hear this, but I'd have to._

_"Tha...That ya were raised inna bad place?" I asked, sheepishly. Her eyes glinted, crushing._

_"Close, but no cigarette," she said. This dark thing growing, tangible. I could smell it. She was holding something back. "But since you don't get it, I'll just have to say it."_

_Wind picked up. Her hair blew softly, covering her face._

_"I'm a project."_

_I did not know what she meant. A project of what? What was any of this supposed to mean?_

_"A wha'?" I asked. Her bangs, covering her eyes, which I knew lay under there, dark, shining, perceptive. She caught every movement, the waves of the grass, the pulse in my neck._

_"A government project."_

_She rolled up her shirt, and there, tattooed on her belly, was a tiny number. 23.23._

_At first I wanted to stare at her. I hadn't heard her correctly. Or maybe, I had. A government project. Couldn't be. Wasn't possible. But there, clear as day, was my proof, inked into her otherwise-spotless body, permanent. They had dared to brand her, as one would brand cattle. I cant believe I hadn't noticed it before... but then again, there were slim to none oppurtunities to see it._

_"...Noodle..."_

_She rolls her shirt back down, and pats the soft ground next to her. "Sit."_

_I sit, silent._

_"I was born in Japan, like I said. When I was two, I was taken from my parents to a government institution. They told us it was a school for the advanced. That's all they said."_

_She sighed. "That's all they said," she muttered to herself."I can't remember any of that, but that's what I was told."_

_"When I was five, the experiments started. They were... so, so bad. There was one I remember. They tried testing our bodies, to see if we could handle radiation." She paused, and her voice hardened, cracking, shaky. "We lay on tables. They were cold and metal, and we didn't have clothes."_

_"They scanned a beam through us. My hair started falling out. I was throwing up for... days. One or two of my friends died when I was there, more or probably dead now. One girl I knew was fine. In the middle of the night, she started coughing up flecks of... The next morning, she was dead, in a pool of blood and that stuff she choked up. Lying right next to me, too. Only six."_

_Her tone was lying, she wasn't really as uncaring as she said. It was one of the mysteries about her, how you could teach yourself to show no remorse for your murdered friends. But it's kill or be killed, every man for himself, and I was just glad she was here now._

_"When I was eight," she continued, "Eight to thirteen, I went into training. Almost as bad as the testing. Hell. Nobody should ever feel that stuff." She pauses, and I know something bad is going on in her mind, something I can't control. "Shut up," she says, to no one in particular._

_"And when I was thirteen, it was all done. They handed me a plain white plastic card with my number, 23.23, and told me to use it if I ever needed money. And that was that."_

_"Noodle, I... are ya' serious?"_

_"Why would I lie about something like that?" Her anger flared. "Did you not see the tattoo?"_

_"I'm sorry! I jus'... What did they do ta ya'? Did they change you 'round inside aw turn you inta a robot or summfink?"_

_She took a deep breath, calmed herself. "I have an idea, but I don't exactly know. You wanna hear the long version?"_

_"Hit me."_

_She smiled a bit. "Well, y'see, there was this one test, it was the worst one. In fact, I was the only one who could handle it, so far I know. This is what I heard from the researchers."_

_"The scientists had created a human-computer project, one that tried to improve the human body's strengths beyond known limits. By injecting a series of nanite computers, they could make a superhuman. So they knocked me out and gave me a shot with some nanites. Then, they opened my head and attached a tiny computer chip into the skull, where the nanites would react. Now, whenever I become 'activated', the computer sends a shock to the nanites and stimulates them to absorb into my muscles. It makes me 100x stronger."_

_She took a long breath, and laughed at my face. Advanced reading. Whoa. I couldn't even fathom being that strong._

_"Of course," she said, "just having them in me makes me stronger than a normal person, a side effect, but it isn't bad. So, I guess I'm not a robot, if that's only what you wanted to know. I'm a..." she searched for the word, "...Hybrid?"_

_All I could do was blink._

_"2D? You still in there?"_

_The first words I spoke were not choice._

_"I...I'm dating a robot?"_

_Noodle gave me a playful smack upside the head, or maybe it wasn't playful. "No, you're dating a human with a pc in her head. I've got parents, I've got organs, and I don't run on batteries. Don't think of me as a hybrid. No one's perfect."_

_"But they just turned ya out on the street with a littl' card? No shelta'? No seein' ya off? Aren' you too powaful t' go out alone?"_

_"Hey, relax! Take a chill pill. Money's all you really need out on the street, right? You can buy whatever you need so you don't remain on the street. This card has more money than I can imagine on it. $7 billion, at least. I'm being funded by the Japanese government, remember. The people the PPCDA and I am fighting. And I, excuse me, we, were emancipated, so we're technically adults... I was all set to go."_

_"Was?" I ask. It sounds like something had happened..._

_She pauses, then stands up. "Oh, look. We're at Kong."_

_"Noodle, wha's goin' o–"_

_"That's for another time," she says, kissing me briefly. I feel the heat rising, but can't help thinking. She has three legs out, but is still in her shell. I need the fourth. The fourth will give me the full picture of this one who stepped into my life and won't get out. Who I won't let get out._

_She drops the ladders, not unlike a boat._

_"Don't worry," she advises me, "Had I not told you this, you wouldn't have thought any different of me than when we met. I'm happy with who I've become."_

_But, you're wrong, Noodle. I don't really think any different of you. Because it's you who I've fallen in love with. Same as always, and will never chan_ge.


	12. Goals

Chapter Twelve

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Disclaimer: I don't own Gorillaz.

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**  
A/N: I'm back after a vacation and posting again! REVIEW, DAMMIT! (and thanks to all the people who already do. But I know some people aren't doing their share when I get 5 comments and 89 views for a chapter.) Keep in mind, the rating may go up in a rapidly approaching chapter.**

**The following chapter is based on real events that happened some time ago, when I began writing. Message me for details.**

* * *

Noodle was high on life. All of a sudden, her worries had melted.

Everyone in the house noticed it, not just me this time. Energetic, excited. She ignored anything negative. Her PPCDA magazines were piling in the garbage, and if there was no more room in the garbage, they piled next to it, instead.

She loved living. But I had the feeling she was looking for something that wasn't there. And no one could break it to her. No one could tell her there was nothing left to live for in this world, nothing except each other. And still, she searched on. If she couldn't find a reason to live, she'd make it.

* * *

There was one time, her first and last attempt to create beauty, something to live for. It was a Tuesday. She was out with her friends, the older girls, seniors in school, with long black hair and their clear eyes, reading poetry and practicing Zen. Pale skin, faces calm, army headbands, rings from their boyfriends on their long fingers. 

Noodle, she laughed along with them, in the center of their circle, but it was easy to see why it was them who followed her. She was calm, relaxed, unreadable. She made the decisions that saved their asses plenty of times, but what trouble girls like these could get into, I could not imagine.

They had decided to go around town, the movies... Noodle had her own agenda - she told me she'd go to the shops and get me a surprise. As they headed out the door, she pecked me on the forehead, and ruffled my hair. "Be back soon. Love ya."

"See ya," I called, watching them from the beach chair on the porch. I heard one of the girls saying, "You are so lucky to live with them you know that?"

Noodle paused, then chuckled. "It can be a blessing or a curse." More laughter, then they headed down the road and faded from view.

An hour later, I wanted a grilled tuna sandwich. Like, really badly wanted it. So I picked myself up and headed inside, and had almost found and retrieved the bread, when who walks in but dearest Noods. And she was not alone, for in her hand, she carried a metal-wire cage with four tiny birds!

I gaped. As if her rarely-mentioned monkey friend 'Mike' who stops in for food, then hops back over the fence wasn't enough! She gently put the cage on the floor and pointed.

"Finches," she said. There was one white, one black, one gray, and one splotched. "Hope you don't mind."

Murdoc walked in abruptly, stopping and staring at the birds. "Ohh," he said, "Dinner."

Noodle jumped, not realizing he had come in, and clung to the cage like a magnet. "One toe out of line from you," she warning, hissing, "an I'll chop it off."

Muds blinked and slowly backed out of the room...

* * *

She took really good care of them. REALLY good care of them. She pampered those things. A nice cage in a corner in a clean patch of the lawn, right under her window. She became obsessive.

We lay in her room one day, on her bed, flipping through channels on the TV suspended from the ceiling. We stopped at a Spanish soap opera, which was very interesting, aside from the fact that it was in... well, Spanish. Noodle, however, watched it, and liked it.

"Oi, Noods, d'ya 'ave tha English version a' this?" I asked. She tilted her head to look over at me.

"Yeah," she replied, "It's called reality."

I chuckled. "D'ya unnerstand it, then?"

"Yup," was the answer, "In training, we learned five different languages. Spanish, Italian, German, French, English. We already knew Japanese, and we studied sign language. Well, actually, we first studied Latin, which made it much easier, being how it's the root language of all the others. But English was tough. It has it's own words."

"You speak it fine," I said.

"Arigato. Danke. Gracias. Merci. Grazie." She made some strange motion with her hand and laughed.

She was amazing. This extraordinary being laying next to me, speaking better English than someone who had spoke it all their life.

How could it be me who had caught her? Why did I, 2D, a smoking, drinking, usually hooker-embracing guy, have the fortune of finding someone as perfect as Noodle? What did I do to deserve her, when there were hundreds of hardworking men better than me looking for their soulmates?

Was Noodle a warning? Was she a sign, telling me something was about to go terribly wrong, that there was a mistake, that she was a taster of the girl that I'd want most of all but never have? Was she too good to be true?

What was the price I'd have to pay for her?

"Stu!"

My name snapped me from my reverie. Noodle's eyes were wide.

"Well," she said, "that seemed to work."

"Anythin' ya want, love?"

She shrugged. "Just to tell you - I have names for the finches. Tell me how you like them."

She listed them on her fingers.

"Let's see, we've got Aika, Mome, Maruci, and Kyokomono. Good?"

"They sound pretty," I admitted, "'specially Aika an' Mome. But I still don' speak Japanese."

She laughed. "It's funny you say that," she observed, "Aika was my mother's first name. Maruchi was the girl I told you about, the one who coughed herself to death." A pause. "Mome was my nickname. And Kyokomono was my first boyfriend."

"First boyfriend? Hmm. Whateva 'appened ta' im?"

"We met in training. I was 12, he was, 14, maybe? We only saw each other on the shooting range. He thought I was funny or something, he'd always tease me about the way I handled a rifle. I guess that's what made me so determined, trying to prove myself. Eventually, he asked me out." She picked at her fingernails. "I got my first kiss to that kid."

"It was my first public relationship, being that they were forbidden in 'school.' But all my friends knew about it. After school disbanded and we were released and I got my apartment, he showed up at my doorstep. It was a year later. He told me people were after him, and he'd probably never see him again. So he left, and I haven't heard from him since."

"So..." I asked, slowly, "If 'e came back on up 'ere tomorrow, would ya' love 'im again?"

She wrapped an arm around my neck and kissed my chin. "What do you think, 2D-san?"

"I... Well, I dunno, tha's why I'm askin'!"

"You're really that unsure?"

"I-"

"Relax." She kissed my lower lip again. "Crushes fade, that one's dead. Kyokomono made a big dent in my life, but I'm willing to leave it alone if you are."

I took that as a truce. If I no talky Paula, she no talky Kyononononononono.

"Love ya," I said, kissing her in return.

We kissed and kissed again, and, well, y'know... it gathered up speed as it went. In a minute, I was trailing my lips down her neck, where I bit into her shoulder. I couldn't help myself. Noodle made a huffed sound, or maybe that was me. But something was not right, for when I clamped down, she lifted my face to hers, pecked me on the cheek and murmured, "I've got to go... got to feed the birds..."

Without saying anything else, she picked herself up, flicked the TV off, and left the room, maybe a bit too quickly.

"Tuppence a bag," I muttered, getting no response. Fuck those birds. I want Noodle.

I heard the cage slamming shut outside the window. "Mome..." she cooed, followed by a short 'peep.' I could imagine her cuddling the tiny thing, rubbing it's feathers and changing the seeds in it's cage. Those little attention whores.

But suddenly, I felt a pang of guilt. Noodle was young. I was... not. It was times like these that made me remember how little and fragile and ... well, 'unexperienced,' she was. I felt a blush rise to my face thinking about it. She wasn't stupid, she knew they didn't need to be fed at that moment...

Whatever. If it meant I had to wait years, I would. Noods was not getting off the hook this easy.

* * *

A week passed, with no further mention of that afternoon. It was a Wednesday morning. A dead morning.

I was sitting in the café, having my Irish coffee with large amounts of alcohol in it, when Noodle, already awake and dressed, comes bounding in and yanking on my sleeve.

"2D-cha'!" she calls, "C'mere, I wanna show you how to clean the bird cage, in case I ever go out and can't do it."

After a bit of reluctance, I gave in. Let her show me.

We went outside, me still in my robe and bunny slippers, circling the yard until we found the cage. But something was not right.

The usual peeping that came from inside the wires was replaced by silence. The critters were not hopping and flapping about the mesh as they usually did.

Noodle's pace slowed. "...What?" she asked, stopping. We stared, neither daring to really go up to the cage...

"Noodle," I said. She hushed me, and crept towards the wire.

A few feet before it, she stopped. Froze, right then and there. I did not move.

"Oh, my god..."

Her words were horrified and disgusted. She was tense. Her arms were rigid. Frozen in mid-step. I came up behind her, to see what she was looking at. But as I reached out a hand to touch her shoulder, she dropped to the ground, kneeling, and I saw what she had been looking at.

Body parts... the scattered pieces, wings, feathers, feathers clumped together with blood, bits of bone...

My throat tightened, this was what hell looked like... Noodle made a retching noise.

She was holding a grey wing. She ha not said anything, not a word. I waited for her, not wanting to be first to talk.

"Cats."

She spat out that tiny thing, her voice hoarse.

"Cats," she repeated, like I hadn't heard her the first time.

The mesh cage had been torn open. Feathers were everywhere.

"Noodle," I said, squatting down next to her, "Noodle, I'm..."

"I'll fucking kill it," she said. I could not see her face, but her outstretched hand was shaking like a leaf. Anger coursed through her veins, faster than her blood did. The aura here had changed. She was not sad. She was fire.

"It's survival, love," I reasoned, "Cats gotta–"

"That fucking thing comes here again, and I'll kill it. I'll dice it. Chop it to pieces, murder it." I had never seen her this angry before. It scared me. I wonder if she'd get activated or something. "Cats kill for the sweet fuck of it," she said.

Her head turned. Unblinking, green eyes. Danger zone.

A deathly smile, teeth white as paper.

"I think I might give it a try, too..."

* * *

Russel and I eventually convinced her to calm down. I finally realized why Noodle was such a threat to anyone who opposed her.

She made three crosses. Wood. They read the names of the birds, Mome, Aika, Maruchi.

She did not make one for Kyokomono.

"Noods," Russ asked, upon seeing them, "What about that other bird?"

"There was no other bird," she said.

* * *

I found her lying on the floor on the kitchen one day, her face pressed against the cold floor.

I didn't bother to ask what she was doing, Noodle had her strange ways. So I lay down next to her and stared.

"Hey," she muttered. Now that the birds were gone, she had freed up her schedule.

"Love," I said, "Whaddaya thinkin' 'bout?"

She ignored that. "2D, what if I don't live to see my goals achieved? What if I die before this war is over? It hit me all of a sudden." A pause. "I'm all they have. If I go, we lose the fight."

"Yaw tha strongest they 'ave. Tha's why yaw what they depend on," I said.

"What if I can't do this? If I can't protect them? There's 22 more kids out there who they can use against me, and I couldn't fight that."

I lay quiet for a minute, trying to think of what to say.

"But..." I managed, "If all a' those kids went through what you did, then why'd they take the gov's side? Theah with ya, aw theah dead."

We lay there, so silent, so silent. She slid her hand across the floor, and I took it and held it.

"What if I can't finish everything I want to?" she asked.

"Then do it now." Because it was the only true to god answer I could give, or think of. And I didn't want to scare her or upset her by saying it, but that was what I honestly thought. Do it now.

She nodded, her hair fanning out on the tiles.

"Okay."

And she held my hand and slid closer and touched my forehead with hers. And we lay until a thousand years passed by.


End file.
